Monday, January 17, 2005

I didn't have to use my A.K. today either

I was sitting in my backyard area yesterday morning eating cereal and reading the Times with NPR playing very faintly on my stereo, when I heard what sounded like the first verse to "Straight Outta Compton". I disregarded this as a figment of my imagination for the entire day until I heard someone mention that Ice Cube was interviewed on a program on the radio that morning-on NPR. It was an interview hyping his new picture (I watched the Golden Globes last night so I call them "pictures" now) called "Are We There Yet" or something. What the fuck happened to Ice Cube? 'Straight Outta Compton' is right. 'Cube is now starring in warm friendly family comedies with CGI deer in them now. Ice T would never pull that kind of shit.

5 comments:

Justin Cooley said...

I am fascinated by your ideas and I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

Anonymous said...

Hi. I know you don't know me or anything, but my name is Brenda, although, I've been trying reallyreallyreally hard to get everyone to start calling me Chloe. So, if you want, you can call me Chloe. You can be like, 'Oh, I know this girl named Chloe. She responded to one of my blogs.' You don't have to say 'Brenda.' Unless, you want to. I'm just giving you an option. Anyway, I know you don't know me, but I feel like I know you a lot. I go to this University, and I sometimes look on the internet for research and stuff for my assignments, and one of my friends, Leslie, told me to check out these blog things, because it's a good way to meet boys. And I don't mean my brother Ronnie's friends, because I already know them, and I am looking for someone more kind and sensitive. I mean, Danny's ok, but he smells like fish. Anyway, I just saw your blog and I think it's really neat, and I think you're really neat, too. I wish I could meet you, but I saw that you're from San Luis Obispo, and I live in Orange County (they call it that because a lot of Orange trees grow here. Did you know that Gwen Stefani is from here? I love her new CD Love. Music. Love. Baby. IT ROCKS!!! By the way, I don't watch 'OC' just because it's about my hometown. I think it's a bad representation of my generation, plus my friend Naomi auditioned as an extra for the show and they told her she's too fat, which she is, but I don't watch the show). Anyway, I looked up San Luis Obispo on the Internet atlas, and it's far, and then my mom told me we went there when I was four to visit Hearse Castle. Then Ronnie wanted to know what I was talking about and I had to tell him because including him in my life is part of his anger management therapy, and if I didn't and he punched the wall, I'd have to run three laps with him, even though he'd have to run twelve. So, then, he wanted to see your blog and I let him, and I'm reallyreallyreally sorry but he said you're gay. ANd, I know you're not, but he's like, 'Gay ass motherfucker trying to get some internet ass.' Then mom charged him two dollars, one for saying motherfucker and one for saying ass. She's made 63 dollars since last week for charging him for cursing, and when she told him the new total, all he said was 'That's only 8 dollars away from 69, bitch.' And then mom didn't know if she should charge him again or tell him his math was really off. That's why I'm really glad I have the blog. So I can escape my outer constraining layer of morbid existence. Does that sound cool? I want to be a writer. I write poems and stories and all sorts of things. So, we have something in common- a continous and illuminating love for words as a means for communication in an otherwise vexing and taxing world. Oh, I wrote you a poem. I hope that's ok:
Guy from San Luis Obispo
Same place as Hearse
Wears navy shoes
'Cuz purple ones are worse
Met him on the computer
Doesn't know me
Safe in his computerized arms
An online world is where we'll be
Love
Safe
Shoes
Hope
Heart
Jewish
NPR
Ice Cube
You and Me.

I hope you like it. If not, I have lots and lots and lots more. Well, I guess, I have lots and lots and lots more even if you DO like it! Well, I hope you will write more amazing and inherent blogs for me. You have really enlightened and reshaped and tethered my life. Do you eat meat? I'm not eating red meat because I'm scared of mercury and maybe infecting a future child I may bear. How old are you? Have you written any novels? I would love to read them. Oh, I work at Baskin Robbins, and I was wondering, what's your favorite ice cream flavor? Well, let me know how you are and I hope you know how important your blogs are to me.
A frenetic and frantically fantasical new friend,
Chloe Dove (that's not really my middle or last name, but I like it) Hey, what's your middle name???

Justin Cooley said...

what

Bill Eseltine said...

"chloe." I'm waiting for your novel. Send me the manuscript. I need to know a lot more about "ronnie."

MICHAEL DEGNAN said...

I love your fan base HZA. I am super envious. Also that interview was on Fresh Aire and I listened to it as well. There was something so wonderfully odd about Terry Gross talking to Ice Cube about Fuck the Police.