I will finally write my paper after this entry, I promise

I have learned so much in the last two days. Most importantly I learned that I was paid $4o for mileage driving to a recent archaeological job. This means that I can purchase: 3 cds or one pair of shoes (running) or one pair of pants or ...what? Not quite as importantly I learned some very interesting information from Discover magazine. Did you know that: Airplanes have to make allowances for volcanos when they fly? Pretty much anywhere in the world there is volcanic ash in the air-too much of which will make the plane crash into the earth killing all passengers on board (potentially you). Also, there are archaeologists working with NASA to make the site of the first landing on the moon (Tranquility Base) an historic archaeological site, to be managed by the National Parks Service. Even less importantly I learned that on late night political talk shows, you can say pretty much whatever you want because they think that no one is watching besides drunkish twenty something guys shouting at the television in their boxer shorts...which got me thinking that I could be on one of these shows as a guest political commentator and here is what I might say:
I believe that the Bush administration not only knew about but PLANNED the 9/11 attacks. This was to draw attention away from the real battle being waged against the Knights Templar and a desperate fight to conceal the pagan nature of Christ from the world. Von Danniken's work prophecied a "second coming" of our astral ancestors, the very same alien race that is responsible for the fantastic technological innovations of the Mayans and the Atlanteans. This second coming will destroy the leaders of men! Then the true masters of the human race, the mighty rulers of the planet Myythryyycinkk, led by the benevolent Izzzxxxckkzxxz, shall assume their rightful place on the throne. The tales of the resurrection of Osiris-Dionysus shall be made manifest as Osiris-Dionysus-Mithras-Christ returns to life a staggering third, fourth, fifth, and sixth time, to challenge Izzzxxxckkzxxz for the hearts and souls of men. The Pentagon and Bush's dark cabal have made a vile bargain with Izzzxxxckkzxxz, inviting the sinister alien race back to the world that the heroic Rosicrucian Knights so valiantly defended eons ago. 9/11 was only the beginning...
(I copied this from something I wrote somewhere else, btw)
Finally I learned that Jessica Simpson's husband, Nick something?-That guy is definitely gay. Bill, if you are reading this you should check out his show.